:D&D! - Session 3

Today Leo was approached by Farmer Billy, whose hens had been stolen by green rat-people. He was understandably upset. He gave Leo a donkey named Jackass equipped with cages and Leo and "Jack" went into the woods to save Camilla retrieve the poultry.

The first chicken will ultimately be the least traumatized. Leo had to chase her around some, and also she bit him.

The second chicken was a total badass and was furiously pecking the rat holding her by the feet. When the rat started swiveling its ears around trying to figure out where Leo's sling bullet came from, the chicken bit one ear. The rat let go of the chicken. The chicken did not return the favour.

Another rat removed the chicken, and Leo took a sip of invisibility potion and swooped in to bag the chicken before the rat could hurt her (or, more likely, before she could strip the flesh off of it's tender little hands).

Then Leo engaged the rats in battle. While holding a chicken in a sack. He splattered the skull of one rat, but the other one lunged with a spear, missed, and ended up with his spear deeply buried in a tree. (We were in hysterics.) Unfortunately, my dice decided they hated me at that point. Fortunately, the rat didn't fare much better. There was a lot of misses, Leo hammered a tree and pissed off a squirrel, etc. Eventually Leo just let the rat run and went and put Chicken 2: The Peckening into her very own cage -- accidentally scary the daylights out of the donkey, due to being invisible. OOPS.

Leo: Next time, I'm not hanging onto the bag o' chicken if I can help it. Throws off my balance.

Invisible again, Leo returned to the giant-tree/cave entrance thing and explored in, following the sound of clucking. (Incidentally, if you are invisible and you're carrying a lit torch, the torch itself is invisible but the light is not. Which is good in that you can see, and also could be very useful for scaring people, faking a haunting, etc.)

Alas, the path to the chicken stash was guarded by a giant fire ferret. Leo almost died twice in this battle. On the bright side, it's much easier to bash something in the head if it's latched onto your leg and won't let go. He had to drink his healing potion (tastes of strawberries!) mid-fight just to survive, and he could have used another afterward. Erring on the side of caution, he went invisible again and limped his way into the burrow where the chickens were.

chickens: *cluck in fear and gaze in awe at the mobile source of light -- the sun had a baby and sent it to find us!*
Leo: *has torch*

The chickens were not the most interesting thing in the room, though. There was a ledge at the back overgrown with moss and fungi and other such things. The elven skeleton on the ledge was also overgrown. It had a very rusted dagger, which Leo took as proof (as a Cleric, he's not allowed to use sharp weapons). There was also a wooden chest which essentially disintegrated when Leo touched it. Fortunately, he found a flask of healing potion inside and immediately downed it. Also some elven chainmail (wrapped in what proved to be some very fine purple elven linen, once washed), a stash of elven money, a couple of scrolls, and what would prove to be a magic ring.

And then the skeleton got up.

And once again, Leo's attempt to Turn Undead did not work. (I rolled pretty close, though, so I hope he felt like he was almost getting it right). He didn't have any holy water on him -- an oversight I intend to correct before next session -- so he whacked/squished it to pieces with his hammer.

Leo: Ew. *wrinkle nose*

Leaving, he came across two more rat people, one of whom was the one he'd let escape before (I think?). He would have just snuck past them, as much as an invisible dude in a forest, wearing armour and carrying a sack with two chickens and some chainmail in it can sneak -- except one of them was wearing a shrunken head on a necklace. Leo's not cool with that.

This time, he hid the chickens before starting a fight.

He managed to splatter the shrunken-head-wearing one's skull open, and he other rat just ran the fuck away.

Leo and Jack took the chickens back into the village with greater speed than it had been possible to coax the donkey into the woods in the first place, and Farmer Billy was very happy. Unwilling to shake Leo's brains-and-miscellaneous-gore-splattered hand, but happy. Leo is assured of a lifetime supply of eggs. He made sure to point out the violent hen, in case she takes sick from consuming rat-person-flesh, and then he had a beer, took a long bath, and told his story.

The villagers were not pleased that the rats have taken to domesticating the fire ferrets, and were suitably impressed/grossed out by the shrunken head.

The only thing Leo set on fire this time was his torch.

Also! He is no longer an Acolyte! He leveled up, so now he his *fanfare* Leo the Adept. And you know what that means, aside from more hit points? SPELLS, BABY! 8D

:D&D! - Session 2

Today we finally managed to get back to the adventures of Leo the Acolyte. (Session 1 was back in July.) Despite the intervening months for us, for Leo his second opportunity to collect phat l00t was about day after he reached Estwind, that village near the temple ruins he reconsecrated.

So, today's adventure also involved going underneath some ruins, this time because one of the locals had already done so and had gotten beaten up and kinda scorched by "flying glowing firey things!"

Leo: *makes sure to bring a full waterskin* :3

Ooh! ooh! Also, the mayor asked him to go looksee! :D Because that is his job now, being an adventurer. He's very proud of himself.

Today's ruins were the remains of a wizard's tower that...kind of... exploded a while back. The underneath bits were much less exploded when he got there. There was a spiral stairwell a hundred feet deep which periodically turned into a slide. He grabbed the wall and saved himself the first time, but the second time he slid into the chamber below on his butt. He was holding a torch, but neither dropped it nor set himself on fire.

Leo: *winces and rubs his butt and illuminates that silver lining with his undropped torch*

In the room at the bottom of the stairwell, he was attacked by some firey glowing hot brass dragonflies, which he took out with his sling, and then he was attacked by another one in the corridor beyond that.

dragonfly: *drops down on Leo from above*
Leo: *unmanly shriek aagh aagh getitaway*

He found some books about dragons, which he took, and some pornographic doodles, which he left where they were, and a skeleton on a marble bed wearing a wig and a nifty magic shawl. He took the shawl, and also a pretty ring, a lot of frikkin' money, a healing potion and some vials of tincture of striking, which I only just now realised would have been really useful when he tried to leave and was attacked by a wooden statue, considering his war hammer? Didn't do much.

Leo: *swings hammer!*
statue: *is not affected!*
Leo: .... *attacks with torch!*
statue: *FWOOSH!*
Leo: ... SHIT! *runs away from flaming attack statue*

No, seriously. He ran away from it around the chamber until it burned up entirely. And then he put out the remaining embers because he was taught to be responsible about that sort of thing. (Which is why he keeps setting his enemies on fire.

Leo: *protest* It keeps working!

Uh-huh. That's why he was tempted to set something on fire and drop it down the middle of the stairwell to see what was at the bottom.

Leo: *crosses arms* I didn't actually do it.)

Now he has the magic shawl to heal him (useful, one of the dragonflies landed on his face) and to set things on fire without having to be in torch-swinging range.

And also he has a rep! :D

Leo: *makes his way back to the inn without sliding back down the trapped stairs (though it was close) and sets a few things on the counter: the remains of the outer layers of no-longer-on-fire clothes yon nosy local left behind, and the remains of the little buggies what set him on fire* Beer, please! :D
Innkeeper: :3 *gives him a beer*

He stayed up all night telling the story to people who asked, and slept the next morning.

It's good to be an adventurer. :3

Leo: Only 144 exp 'til I can CAST SPELLS! 8D

:D&D! - Session 1

Today I played D&D -- Basic, Red Box D&D. A solo adventure, just Leo, my newbie Cleric (level 1 = Acolyte), and his war hammer, let loose from the cloister* on his own recognizance and told to go forth and be cool --

-- oh, and while you're on your way, take a detour to this abandoned temple of ours and reconsecrate it, 'kay?

So he did. :3

Leo: *BEAMS with accomplishment* :D

The temple had been abandoned for some 60-odd years and was really more like a shrine in size, and not really standing anymore, per se. But he walked up the front steps, and jumped down into the grass growing past the crumbling other side of the threshold, and promptly got in a fracas with a couple of green rat people.

Leo: O.o ...green... rat-people... green...

Leo won, but not without getting a little spear in his leg. The rat-dude who managed that got his head exploded by a powerful blow from Leo's war hammer. The second one was sent flying and didn't survive the experience.

Underneath the temple, Leo encountered a room with the very old partial remains of members of his order, two of whom attacked him (slowly), completely and utterly failed to turn them (I rolled a 3 -_-; ), smashed them, barricaded them in -- later that night he sprinkled them all with holy water, and the next day gave them all proper burial.

Leo: :3 *respect*

There was a third, better armed and armoured (this one has chainmail and a sword!) rat-person looting the room with the secondary altar.

Leo: B| We don't look kindly on looters.

They fought, Leo won, and took his loot, arms, and armour! :D (...No, he sees no contradiction here. He wasn't looting the temple.) He piled the rat people bodies in the woods for the crows to feast on (the crows were happy to see him come with a third body -- this kid's alright! :D) and the next day he burned the rat-people remains along with some of their less savoury possessions (including a cheese).

After this fight, he glugged back a healing potion (tastes of strawberry! :D), reconsecrated the temple, and fought a small water slime that was in the basement.

Leo: *swings hammer!*
slime: *ducks* Nyah-nyah!
Leo: .... *attacks with torch!*
slime: *FWOOSH!*
victory music: *plays*

After that, he sacked out in the room with the holes in the ceiling through to the outside, which doesn't sound terribly bright from a structural point of view, but he wanted ventilation for a fire, since he'd gotten his boots soaked. And he fell asleep there. (Awww...)

Before he left, he rounded up the cult objects still in the temple and took them with him to the nearby community, to entrust to the cloister there.

Leo: :3 Good times! :D


* Cloister is used advisedly. His order is all-male, and he went to join when he was at apprenticing age (12, 13) and didn't have much contact with the general public during his training. He's 18, and he hasn't spoken to a girl that wasn't his mom since he was a sprog. X3 I anticipate a lot of social "...what? ^^;" from this, at least in his own mind.

Ye Olde Introductory Post

This journal will primarily be for gaming-related posts, of the paper-and-dice varieties. I make no guarantees of sticking to any one edition or, indeed, any one game! I'm a little too randomized for that, and I know it. ;3

As to the blog title -- the first 3e D&D game I was in, our party earned the unofficial sobriquet of "the witless wonders" for the way they just seemed to fall into various adventures, and solutions, some of the time. Not that they didn't seek out adventures and take what they did seriously. I think the NPCs were amazed they got anything productive done at all -- and meanwhile the party were killing demons and stopping Scro invasions, etc. It was a very fun game to play, and so I figured I'd reuse the name here.

The first thing I'm going to do here is post three logs about a Basic D&D game I've been playing with Taichara -- she DMs and I run my PC around -- just because this blog looks so empty!